It's time to play How Out Of It Am I? Animating event: tonight at DCA airport the place I sat down to eat at had ipads to order from. Yeah, asshole, I managed to put in my order, no problem there. But when it came time to swipe my card, I couldn't figure out where to do it. A black guy sitting next to me noticed me limply brushing my credit card against a black plastic rectangle jutting out from the bottom of the screen. "It's over there," he said, pointing to the familiar short vertical shelf sitting some nine inches to the right. "Thanks!" I said with sincere gratitude, adding explanatorily, "I was born a very long time ago." The black man was so gracious, he said, "No, it confused me at first, too."